In the story "A Good Man is Hard to Find" and the story "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?" how is Arnold Friend similar to the Misfit?

Both Flannery O'Connor's "A Good Man is Hard to Find" and
Joyce Carol Oates's "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?" are unusual stories that
have their turning points brought about by the appearance of a literary
grotesque.  That is, something or a character that simultaneously
invokes in an audience or reader a feeling of uncomfortable bizarreness.  Certainly, in
O' Connor's stories, the grotesque is often used to effect
the conversion to grace in a character. For, in "A Good Man is Hard to Find," the
grandmother is converted when she recognizes herself in the Misfit:  "Why you're one of
my children," she tells him.  In this case, the grotesque evokes
empathy in the grandmother.

On the other hand, in Oates's
"Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?" the grotesque does not evoke empathy in the
main character, Connie; rather, he causes her great terror.  Nevertheless, Arnold
Friend's appearance changes the world for Connie just as the Misfit alters the
grandmother's world as both men overpower and control the destinies of the older woman
and the teen.  Much like the grandmother's epiphany, Connie has a recognition that she
no longer controls her life,

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She thought for the first time in her life that
it was nothing that was hers, that belonged to her, but just a poiunding, living thing
inside this body that wan't really hers
either.

Thus, the Misfit and
Arnold Friend both take control of the lives of their victims and are responsible for
their demise.  In so doing, however, the victims reach a conversion from
their selfishness. That is, the grandmother recognizes the Misfit's sins in herself and
Connie makes a final act of unselfishness in order to save her family from "any trouble"
and Friend tells her, "...you're better than them because not a one of them would have
done this for you."