Describe the theme of Mary, Lady Chudleigh's poem "To the Ladies." Be sure to describe the advice she gives to women.

This is a really great
poem.

Mary, Lady Chudleigh's poem, "To the Ladies,"
provides commentary on the institution of marriage. She begins by putting her heartfelt
conclusion on line one:

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Wife and servant are the
same.

To her way of thinking,
once a woman is a wife, she also becomes a servant: the words are synonymous. The
difference between the two is simply a question of
semantics.

Then she describes the idea and perceptions of
marriage. Often people refer to marriage as "tying the knot." Here the author states
that it is a fatal knot. "Fatal" here is a very precise and dark
word.

Dictionary.com defines the word "fatal" as something
that can cause death or does so. "Fatal" is a warning.

The
lines of a wedding ceremony, "...let no man put assunder" are alluded to: that the bonds
of matrimony never be severed. Lady Chudleigh makes it sounds more like a curse. She
writes:

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...which nothing, nothing can
divide

The repetition of the
word "nothing" stresses how permanent this bond is. Once the woman speaks the word in
her vows "obey," the law "supreme" makes sure this is followed not just in spirit but in
deed.  I sense here that "supreme" does not refer to God, but to men's
laws.

The following line indicates that after the vows, the
"honeymoon is over."

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Then all that's kind is laid
aside

The wooing, love notes,
flowers and flirtations are done with. It's now time to get down to the business of
marriage. A woman takes her vows and she then belongs to him. Like
an "eastern prince," the man grows more powerful, while her power diminishes...and
disappears.

When the speaker refers to "...And all his
innate rigour shows," ("rigour" is the British spelling), she is explaining that once
married, his natural tendency to stiff, unbending behavior awakes. ("Innate" meaning
"there from birth.")

The author goes on to describe the
rules for the new wife: that looking, laughing or speaking when not permitted to do so
is seemingly all it will take to break the wedding vows. Like one who is "mute," she
must make signs rather than open her mouth. This might be literal or figurative: it may
simply mean that the wife may no longer speak her mind, but say only those things
expected of her—which may include only the rhetoric the husband expects to
hear.

The next section goes on to state that the bride will
have no freedom; she will be instructed by her husband's nod [of approval?], and she
must fear him as if her were God. Every day she will be expected to serve and obey, with
no freedom to act or say what she wants—having no original thought; her only sentiments
are those he approves of. He has the power; he is the smart and
funny one (whether he is or not).

Finally, with all these
dire consequences described, the author issues her warning. If I were to think of a
physical metaphor, she is holding up the crucifix to ward off a vampire. With this image
in mind, she declares to women: BE ON YOUR GUARD!

Women
should do anything possible to avoid ("shun") the ["wretched"] state of marriage. (Her
seriousness is seen in her repetition of "shun.") If a man approaches a woman with
flattery and href="http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/fawning">fawning (giving
exaggerated attention), detest him. Beyond all things, a woman should be aware of her
own importance and value, and reject men. A woman must be proud and wise in order to be
happy. Do NOT marry, she implores women!